Vague enough? Okay good. Should have a new short story for you soon and some news regarding other fun stuff.

Anyway, here you go….

Every Man

In the twilight, childhood daydreams plague me.
I was a child, in the bright light, the shining stars
The apple of my mother’s eye
The chip off my father’s block
I was a young god.
Worshipped and Sacrificed to by those that bore me.
A young god in a big world.
A Big world of cost. and tragedy. and listless envy.
A young god growing into the world
as it grew into me.
The city streets the veins in my body, running the
length of me in coils and dead ends.
Firing synapses shot red and green across my vision.
Stop. Go. Eat your dinner. Clean your room.
But never big decisions.
I was a young god. I made no decisions not pre-destined.
Now I’m an old god.
A Vestige of patterned mannerisms and polite conduct.
Of passionless drive and withered ends.
The streets are still my veins, flowing like the lifeblood of youth.
But youth is far away in this place, and smiles don’t meet my eyes.
I’m an old god.
And like all old gods before me
Faceless, Powerless, Lost to time and technology…
I’ll fade away.
I’m an old god.
A god with every man’s face.

Time. There’s never really enough time. While time is circular and no matter how long I wait, I can’t actually run OUT of it, I CAN make myself rather annoyed by wasting even that which is infinite. Oh well no matter now..

I’ve taken to writing again. I’ve found I rather enjoy it and trying to piece together a story is fun. The odd part is, since I’m not in front of my pc much, I’ve taken to writing by hand and transcribing later, editing along the way. If you’re interested, you can read the first short story I’m happy with here:  The Missing Frame

It’s a story about a man and his rather disturbing recurring dream. Let me know if you like it, please.

I have a photoshoot on Sunday with Ms. Mandy Lee Mayhem, so, I’m looking forward to that. I really need to start shooting more. I have TOO many ideas and not enough time to do them all.

So after a decade or so of a 90-minute-to-3-hour-a-night sleeping pattern, my doctor finally threw in the towel and put me on a sleep aide. I have to say, Ambien works wonders and it’s provided me many a sleepful night since, of at least 6 hours or so. I actually feel relatively well rested usually, and I don’t want to pass out continuously.

Last but not least, I’ve got the space and url for a new site. I’m not telling you what it is quite yet because it’s not done, but I’m very VERY Happy with it….so look for that soon.

On the upswing, I’m losing weight because of the constant activity. Furthermore, I’ll be moving the treadmill inside into the air conditioning to assist that, with the intent of dropping a ton of weight(and several clothing sizes) by the time I graduate in February, 2009. I have procrastinated with it long enough and even my doctor is getting on my case.

So I’ve been placed on Ambien, finally, because my 90 minutes of sleep per day sleeping habits were deemed unhealthy by my doctor. I’m not sure how I feel about it yet. I don’t like being chemically dependent on ANYTHING. Furthermore, it seems to be preventing me from either Dreaming or remembering my dreams and I don’t like that. I’m hoping it’s a temporary thing, as I’m rather dependent on my dreaming. More on this later..

I’ve been reading heavily the last few weeks, as I said before. I’ve devoured all of Neil Gaiman’s works in their entirety now. I’ve also read 2 of 3 of the Twilight books, by Stephenie Meyer. I’ve rather enjoyed these. I’m currently on the third book, Eclipse. I’ll have to write up some kind of review soon.

I don’t feel like going to work in 20 minutes.. I really…really don’t.

However, it’s necessary, and I get to listen to more of my audiobook. And I get to go out tonight, which is cool.

Let’s see…what else…

I’m writing again. I’ve actually come up with ideas for 3 very different novels, one of which is more a series OF novels….All three are fantasy or gothic fiction, of course. I haven’t had much time this week to work on them. On is more alternate world fantasy, with magic and whimsy and all that. Another is far more adult in content dealing with murder and vampires and such, and the third I’m not telling yet because I think it’s a really cool idea that hasn’t been done and I don’t want anyone to write it out from under me. Let’s just say it has to do with the Zodiac and leave it there.

I’ve also started scheduling shoots again, figuring I can maybe get in one or two a month while I’m in school til February. I need to do some more edits that I owe people too. I think that’s for tomorrow since I have OFF OF EVERYTHING. No school, no work on Sundays…my one free day a week.

Anyway, gotta go get ready. Later kids. Leave me love.

http://www.perfect-drug.org/downloads/

It’s a nifty Skully wallpaper I made of my iconic skull guy. Hope you like. Let me know if you use it.

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Tonight I finished my third Neil Gaiman book in as many weeks. Having finished American Gods and Neverwhere I turned my attention to Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s Good Omens. I loved it. In the beginning, I felt like I was having a hard time getting into it(or at least certainly harder than I had getting into the other two) but by the end, I was thoroughly enjoying it. Neverwhere, however, remains my favorite so far. Next on the agenda is to locate and read Coraline. I’m also looking forward to the movie version of Coraline. That looks rather fun.

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Finished up a site design for a friend today. If you’re interested, check out princessleia.com and enjoy the star warsian design I made to compliment the name. She apparently loves it. I’m plased with it as well.

You know, I keep going back and forth about what to name the new studio setup. I can’t decide or pick anything and it’s making me insane. I like the concept of using Cambion Art, but, I don’t know yet. Anyone out there in journal land have any ideas? Leave me a comment and let me know.

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Going to the mailbag( yeah, I get fanmail and such, wicked eh? )…

Hyde! We met last year at a Philadelphia Meet & Greet and while I’m sure you don’t remember me, I wanted to ask where you get the titles of some of your pieces. I really really love a lot of them and I’ve been wondering this for a few years now. Love your work! Thanks! Carly C., Abington, PA.

I’ve gotten this question several times in email lately, so I figured I would address it for all you people wondering…

Alot of my titles(of my art and photography, not of my poetry or prose or anything) comes from a combination of some of my favorite songs, and some from a general….shall we say….feeling? Sometimes they come from both. In one of my latest pieces, the shoot with Sally Rouge from last month, I did a shot which was titled “Something Must Break.” The title came from two places. One, from the feeling of the piece where Sally looks incredibly defeated…which, I think was a perfect mood for the piece. Secondly, it’s the title of one of my favorite Joy Division songs.

It’s not the deepest of answers, and maybe not what you were hoping for, but I do take titles from everywhere so it’s not something I can answer easily. Hope it helps.

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Working on some new prose and such lately. Have several story ideas I’d like to make full on novels. Hope that works out in the end.

I want to get those sections up here on perfect drug soon. Poetry needs a place, and so does my writing.

Okay, I’m done rambling for now..

Currently Listening:  “ Meds ” by Placebo

Another long day nearing it’s end. I’m not sure at the moment whether I really want more hours in the day in which to get things done I want done, or if I would just like to sleep for a very long time. Maybe there’s a story in there somewhere…

I’ve been back and forth over a shitload of options at th emoment and my only real one seems to be to wait until I get the money and go from there. I miss having a site, to be honest. This Blog site is new and different and all kinds of fun to mess with, but, I still miss having something that hosts my images. No one wants to let you pay month by month anymore. It’s all Pay a year in advance and hope we’re around that long.

I feel like I have so many projects and I don’t know what the hell to do to get them all done, harkening back to that “Need More Hours in the Day” bit.  I want to get some of my writing and such started on here, get some more stuff written and get it out there for people to see and read. I want to get more artwork done. I want to get back into music. I need to get a couple of friends new sites together. I want, I want, I want. I don’t have enough time.

I’ve come to the conclusion Neil Gaiman is my favorite Author, hands down. I have several I love, but his work hooks me. I especially enjoyed Neverwhere and American Gods, and I want to read Coraline. I’m currently several chapters deep into Good Omens as well.

I guess the only way to make noise is to start screaming.

Past that, things simply are…

I’m going to use www.perfect-drug.org as my own personal journal site from now on, to host my thoughts and my writing, and various other things. I have to give up the name Perfect Drug Art Studios due to moving of servers, but, sometimes a new start is a good idea.

Now I need to decide on a new one.

Anyway, I’m mostly posting this for both update purposes and to test my blog/LJ Crossposter application. Let’s give it a shot, shall we?

Due to a change in policy on the host this site resides on, I can no longer host my stuff here. However, I can’t move it, or give up the host, due to other obligations I have where things are hosted on this space.

Therefore, I have had to give up the name Perfect Drug Art Studios and will have to find new hosting at some point soon. Keep checking back here. I’ll be changing the logo at the top and such and deal with all that, possibly use this site for something else.

I don’t know yet. Thanks for your support and for the emails I’ve gotten wondering where the images have gone.

H.

I’m not actually sure how I feel about it yet except to say, for some reason, I’m looking at the clock and kind of dreading seeing it change to midnight. I don’t know that I have any logical reason for it, really. Hmm…

Anyway, got the preview images for 2 art projects done and up. Some things have changed in terms of names and project purposes. You may want to go look? Yeah I think you do.

The Portfolio page may take on a similar style to be guided by something a bit more interesting instead of just an album box. Yeah I think I’ll do that next, in fact.

“You Left Me High and Tried to Change me. You lied to me now I am angry.

And when the Sun Creeps in your room, and wakes you from your Vanity

You won’t find me ‘cuz I’ll be on top of a Mountain, Pissing on your Grave…”

Okay enough of that…back to work.

Listening To:  “The Last One Alive” - VAST

I really need to get the site done soon. I need to get back to creation instead of management. I need to get back to writing, and to art, and especially….especially Music. I feel like I am in withdraw. I need to get back to writing music and singing music. Cathasis. Screaming, Singing, Melodic Catharsis.

My Birthday is in two days. 26. I feel older. I feel younger. I don’t know…

Listening To: ” Pretty When You Cry ” - VAST